Sunday 25 September 2016


Just watched 'A Walk to Remember' and cried my eyes out! I guess this month only I watched The Fault in Our Stars and yeah of course read the novel as well. I did not know that A Walk to Remember was also based on a similar theme but midway in the movie I don’t know I started to feel like the movie was going to turn in that direction somehow and I could feel my heart getting heavy! When Landon and Jamie were falling in love, I should’ve felt happy for them but i was just waiting for them to reveal what was it that felt so sad! 

Loved the movie and as I was watching it, it suddenly struck me! The biggest regret of my life right now is the fact that I’ve never felt what it’s like to be in love....to feel love. But I guess it's not just for me to ever find out! You see in every movie, the girl is beautiful.... even if she's a geek, even if she's sick, she's dumb.....no matter what, they are pretty or they eventually turn out to be pretty!! But that's something I’m not and never will be! 

god has given me so much.....really has...but not just this one thing and I guess it's the most important thing when it comes to love!
I wonder how it feels to be in love, to kiss someone you love, to spend time with them, be apart from them....... to be something to someone and to be someone's something!

And it’s scary and it scares the hell out of me sometimes and there's probably no one who'll understand and no one I can confide this to.

I think it’s all crap about being beautiful from the inside..... Just stuff people make up to make someone like myself not feel what I really feel!
And I’m not even someone who doesn’t give a crap about what other's think of me or maybe that too are just people in the movies!! I wonder how it feels never being conscious of people looking at you cos your creeping them out or because you're nothing more than a CLOWN to them!!



Another night I cry myself to sleep......


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